It’s Show Time!

We have had an adventure this weekend!

Hal and I have been members of our local riding club since we moved here. . The club, and it’s various members have been a tireless source of advice and information over the last 3 years. . So this year we decided it was time to take our chance at their annual show.
It’s been a long time since I dipped my toe in the sometimes murky waters of the show ring. In her youth, Sapphire used to have a very successful in-hand career, even qualifying for Royal Cornwall Show. It wasn’t me who produced and showed her though, it was our yard manager at the time, Pauline. Sadly Sapphire’s Maast Cell Tumour problem arose just a few weeks before her county level debut, and killed her showing career dead. . A little while before Sapphire Dad and I had a big Palamino Cob mare called Bella on loan. We had her for 10 years, and in fact saw her on ear final journey. Over the years we did all sorts with Bella, and I used to show her at a local level reasonably regularly . This was between 15 and 25 years ago though. All the classes I did back then were under saddle. Things like Tack & Turnout, Best Combination, Best Cob etc. I did have some useful vision back then, but it’s safe to say that I did have some, erm, blind moments occasionally. I couldn’t see the rope that delineated the ring for a start. This didn’t pose a problem when the whole class were parading. It was a bit more of a challenge when it came to doing my individual show, especially in proper cob classes, where you are expected to do a short gallop! Nobody wants to be the one who runs through the rope! 😱 Another potential problem I had was the possibility that I might ride into a steward, or worse, the judge!😰 Thankfully it never happened. I also didn’t always those subtle signals that I was being called in, or being asked to leave the ring. Bella bless her was an old pro though, so we usually came home with a few ribbons☺️

The other thing that was different back then was that the majority of the shows I attended were within hacking distance of the yard where we kept Bella, so there was no need to even think about transport.

So wind forward somewhere between 15 and 25 years. 50%’ of me really wants to go to the Riding Club show, but the other 50% can list a whole range of reasons why it’s a really stupid idea. . How are we going to get there? I’ve got nothing to wear. I can’t go in the ring by myself, I need a guide. Other than Sapphire I don’t think any of the horses have ever been on the Showground before, so they might go daft. All my girls are natural and I don’t want to clip them or pull their manes. The show is on a day with a’y’ in it. I’m sure you get the picture. It turns out that none of these problems are unsumountable.

For my birthday, one of my oldest and dearest friends, Sarah, gave me a Robinsons Equestrian voucher. Enter a smart new pair of beige jodhpurs.with my boots and chaps, my old black velvet riding hat, one of Hal’s shirts, my old black tie from Bella’s day, a pair of black gloves, and a jacket borrowed from Amy, what to wear was no longer a problem. The Riding Club are extremely accommodating, and had no problem with Hal coming into the ring to guide me. Ideal👫 So only 2 real reasons not to do it left. Who to take? It had to be either Florence or Breeze. Florence is beautiful (I might be biased there), but if I’m totally honest, while I trust her totally when I’m on her back, I do sometimes find her a bit strong and bolshy when I’m on the ground. Breeze then? Well, I’m not sure. Actually, my mind was made up when we bathed them the other week (see my previous post “Unwelcome Guests”). Breeze actively enjoys being bathed, whereas Flo really doesn’t. . So it was going to be much easier to get Breeze show ready. We also know that Florence doesn’t travel very well, which leads me onto the biggest problem. How are we going to get there?

Hal and I have been fantasising about having some kind of transport of our own. It’s all a pipe dream. We can’t afford it. Hal has never towed before, neither has he ever driven anything bigger than a Shogun. Until Friday that is. He hired a self drive 3.5 tonne horse box! He picked it up on Friday morning so he could practice bribing it before putting Breeze on board. . Pretty bloody amazing for a man who suffers from severe anxiety. He also arranged for Amy to help us on the day, as neither of us has ever travelled a horse ourself before. When we’ve had to travel a horse we’ve always used a transport company.

Pony all washed and clean
Outfit all prepared
Horsebox on driveway

Looks like we’re off to the show!

Saturday was a beautiful day. The animals were shocked to say the least when I emerged at 5a.m.another groom for an already gleaming Breeze. Check and double check we’ve got everything we need on the lorry. Wash, cress, several nerbous wees . It’s time to load Breeze. Bless her, she walked up the ramp like it was an everyday occurance , and hardly moved for the entire journey.. Mind you, Hal gave her a very smooth drive. Breezd stood on the lorry calmly while we went to get our number, and basically behaved like a lady all day😊

We did 2 in-hand classes, Best Cob,Hunter, Riding Horse, and Best Veteram. True to their word there was no problem with Hal coming into the ring with me. It wasn’t even remarked on so far as I heard.

Bless her, she came fifth in both our classes! What a star😍

I suspect that somewhere in the dim and distant past Vreeze has done stuff like this before. She just took everything in her stride. This is a lovely friendly relaxed show, I didn’t hear a single bitchy comment the whole time we were on the Showground. Also the judge was lovely, full of praise and advice, and mindful that it was a very hot day. Amy, as ever, was a superstar. She really does go above and beyond. We also had support from Ben and his Mum Helen.😊

Thankyou Ruby Moor Riding Club for organising such a friendly, welcoming and inclusive show.

I can only take positives from the whole brilliant experience. It has reawakened my showing demon though😈😉

28 Days to Save the World

As regular followers will know, this has been a particularly difficult year for Florence. She took quite seriously ill in the first week of January, and although she responded to the vets interventions really well at the time, she hasn’t really been right all year. As a result, she has done very little as she doesn’t really seem to want to be ridden. We’ve tried all sorts of interventions, from treating her arthritis, to looking at her tack, feed, supplements, teeth, you name it, we’ve tried it. We’ve had a few little glimpses of hope along the way, but no real progress beyond a certain point. Our gorgeous girl is trying to send us a message, but we just can’t hear what she’s trying to say. It’s frustrating, soul destroying, and heartbreaking in equal measure. Florence is the absolute centre of my universe, I adore her; she challenges me teaches me, and validates me on a daily basis, sitting on her back is my happy place, and when I’m riding her I feel invincible.So it absolutely destroys me that we haven’t been able to find a solution for her.

Florence is quite an old lady now, officially 20, but only she really knows how old she is. Her passport was drawn up before they were compulsary, and her date of birth is a ‘think of a number’ guestimate. Only Florence really knows how old she is, and like any true lady, it’s a closely guarded secret.She owes me nothing, and, if she’s not right by the New Year, or even beforehand to be honest, then I’m OK with the idea of her hanging up her saddle and retiring. However, before we do that, there’s one more avenue to go down.

Gastric Ulcers.

OK, if you just look at Florence, and don’t take any of her behaviours into account, she’s not a classic Ulcer candidate. She’s a big heavy cob, who is a very good doer, and who, at the moment, is scarily obese. She has a light work load, does not compete, and lives out most of the time. However, recent research has shown that any horse can get ulcers, apparently some studies have shown that even ferrel and wild horses show some sign of ulcers on post mortem examination. Also, Flo is a very sensitive soul, and a bit of a worry wart. Her behaviour sometimes includes some classic ulcer related traits; girthiness , sensitivity to touch, mild colicky signs like pawing the ground, which is something she never used to do, refusing to be mounted, and generally being grumpy. Some of you may remember that a few years ago she had two unexplained bouts of colic. She also has Cushings (PPID).

So today we have started a 28 day ulcer protocol to see if it makes any difference. Normally a horse would have an endoscopy to see if there are indeed any ulcers, and whereabouts they are exactly. Differently located ulcers need different medication. However, we would need to take Florence to the vets to have this done, as the equipment is highly sensitive, and does not take kindly to being transported around, and we do not have our own transport yet. So, after having a conversation with my wonderful vet, he decided that we could run Flo on both medications for 28 days to see if it makes any difference.By the time this is done, we should have our own horsebox (there’s a whole new blog post coming about that soon), so if it’s made a difference, then we can take her to be scoped and find out where the ulcers are, and then continue treating with just the most appropriate medication. However, if there is no change, then that’s the end of Flo’s ridden career. Luckily there are no serious side effects of the medications she is on, so this approach will either make a difference, or things will just stay as they are. However, if we all survive the next 28 days it will be a miracle!

This intervention isn’t simple. Both meds have to be given on an empty stomach. This means that Florence has to come in over night so she has nothing to eat for at least 8 hours before. Having her meds; and, because of Flo’s seperation anxiety, the boys have to come in too. This will be a massive challenge for Mayo, who is not used to being stabled overnight, and who is just that little bit claustrophobic. The boys don’t have to be starved though, so it’s not all bad news. Next, one of the meds cannot be given with food. It has to be delivered via aural syringe like a wormer. In the very nearly 4 years that Florence has been with us, worming has always been a battle royal; and now we’ve got to do it every morning for 28 days! It’s going to be a long month!

Normally I don’t bring my horses in over night until at least the middle of November, and later if I can possible do it. Last night we brought them for the first time, and started the ulcer regime. Everybody was fine until we went to check them last thing. Mayo barged out of the stable 3 times in the process of trying to give him a hay net! Bless him, he really doesn’t understand the need to be shut in. Perry though seems to be taking everything in his stride. Honestly, as long as there’s food, I don’t think he minds much to be honest. No early in the morning visit from me today, which felt really wrong; but I neither wanted to start a riot by given the boys hay and not Flo, nor did I want to be flattened by a forced exit from Mayo. However, Hal and I went down later and gave Flo her meds, and the boys some hay. Actually, Hal gave Flo her syringe medicine, and she took it really well. The other med went into a small feed half an hour later. That didn’t touch the sides! Once again Mayo came out of his stable like a cork from a bottle as soon as the bolt was taken off the door. It’s not nastiness, he doesn’t have a nasty bone in his body, he just doesn’t understand, and he probably doesn’t feel all that safe being shut in. Let’s face it he hasn’t been here 3 weeks yet. I’m sure he’ll get the idea. Perry though was as laid back as you’d like. He might be a monster, but he knows which side his breads buttered.

They’re all turned out for the day now, in the Old School Paddock (left hand side as you go into the bottom field) which neither Mayo nor Perry have been in before. We took the boys down together first, and they both walked down really politely. Then Hal went back and got Flo while I stayed in the field to monitor things. The boys both had a really good gallop around, with some bucking and leaping in the air for good measure. Life apparently is good. However, by the time Florence joined them, they’d already got down to the serious business of grazing.

Let’s hope the next 27 days pass as smoothly.

What a Month!

It’s just occurred to me that it’s a month ago today that I rode at Nationals. Really! Where did that month go then?

Honestly we just haven’t stopped. Once we got home we went straight into the whole rehoming process for Peregrine. The car knows it’s own way to the Mare and Foal Sanctuary now, and naps in that direction every time we pass the junction. We’ve also been down to darkest Cornwall several times to view potential new horses, and get Mayo vetted. Then the weather did the dirty on us, so Mayo’s delivery day had to be brought forward. Not that I’m complaining, any extra time spent getting to know a new horse has got to be time well spent, but it did mean we had to suddenly prepare things, rather than having a few days to play with. Since we’ve only had 2 horses for a while, the third stable has morphed into an unofficial storage shed. Let’s face it, the tractor lived in there last winter!

In between all this, we’ve been up to Shropshire to celebrate our neice Hannah, and her lovely man Sam’s wedding. We’ve had the outside of the house cleaned, and we’ve ordered a Horse Box!

It’s no wonder we’re both so knackered!

Today though I finally feel like things are slowing down and becoming more relaxed.

Florence came home exactly a fortnight after we lost poor Breeze, and Melissa took her over to Kingsland. Peregrine came home on the same day, and Mayo came home on Thursday. It’s early days; but all of them are now turned out in the same paddock, and all really does seem to be going incredibly well. I’ve never had such a smooth, or quick introduction of new horses.They all seem totally relaxed about everything. In fact this is the most chilled I’ve ever seen Florence; she really does seem to be warming to her new found status as the matriarch of the herd, and is being remarkably tolerant of having a small pony almost perminantly welded to her side. She called to the boys the other day when I had her out, and called to them both yesterday when they were being worked in the school and she wasn’t. It really couldn’t be going better really.

So now we can relax again and start having fun. I’ve just booked my first lesson since Nationals and I have a plan to try and get Florence hacking out again, I’ve got lots of plans for Mayo, and Peregrine is beginning agility and beginning to walk out in hand. All three horses are far too fat, so are, along with their equally porky owners, officially on boot camp, well, OK, more like comfy slipper camp really, but we all need to be fitter and slimmer.

So now we’re waiting for some concreting to be done. Yes folks, Digger Man Pat is returning, and for the Horse lorry to be built, then the world is our lobster, as Arthur Daily would say.

From where I’m sitting the future is looking very positive indeed.

The Worst Kept Secret – Introducing Mr Mayo #PonyHour #HorseHour #RDA #BlindRiders

As regular followers will know, for a while now I’ve been looking for a new horse. Florence is the absolute centre of my universe, and I trust her completely; but, she isn’t getting any younger, now officially 20, and she’s had a few ongoing health problems this year. In fact, this is partly why losing Breeze was such a shock, as although Breeze was older than Flo, she was generally in much better health.I hope to be able to keep Flo going for a while yet, but she is definitely looking for the quiet life nowadays, whereas, having rediscovered my love of dressage, want to start doing a bit more. Hence the decision to get another horse for me to ride.

Now, although I want to do dressage, I also want to be able to hack out safely, and do some of the things that the riding Club put on. The level of dressage I’m anticipating doing is quite basic, unaffiliated, as well as RDA competitions. I loved my experience of Nationals this year, and I’d really love to get there again, with my own horse. Being blind, I have some very niche requirements in any horse, which can be tricky to find all rolled up in one package. They need to be calm, confident, and forward thinking, but not buzzy, overly spookey, and definately not prone to tanking off. They need to be able to think for themself, but still listen to their rider, and they need to be very very genuine , and quite brave, but not so gung ho that they don’t look after themselves and their rider. They also need to be polite and easy to handle on the ground, but at the same time, they do need to be open to their handler being more, well, up close and personal, and hands on. It also helps it they can cope with being walked into occasionally, and they absolutely must be easy to catch.There’s also that other, undefinable thing, and it’s something you will never know about a horse until you start riding and handling it on a regular basis. It’s difficult to explain, but, some horses seem to understand the blindness thing, and others just don’t. A lot like humans really when you come to think of it.

Now, whilst I love horses, and riding, I have to admit that I find the whole, trying out potential new horses thing really stressful and frightening. I really have to trust, even more so than anyone else, that the seller is being honest with me about this horses personality. If a horse tanks off with me I have no way of telling where I’m going, what’s in front of me, either on the ground or overhanging, or what the grounds like… well you get the picture; and that’s on top of the whole, being in a strange and unfamiliar place that I don’t know my way around, and being watched, and possibly judged, by the horse’s owners. I really do find it all very difficult. For these reasons I am extremely picky about what horses I will even consider going to see. I have a list of absolute deal breakers, words and phraises that, if they appear in an advertisement, mean that horse if automatically rejected. Can be nappy, prefers to hack in company, neds experienced rider/handler, to name just a few. Then, when I contact the seller once I’ve read a likely sounding ad, I explain my situation, and see how they react. I once had a persona tell me that their horse, who they were selling as an ideal novice ride, wouldn’t suit me as she was very big. The mare was advertised as 15hh, and at the time I had Magnum, who was a 16.3hh Irish Draught, so I thought it was a strange reaction; but she obviously didn’t think I was right for the horse, so I didn’t labour the point. Mind you, some people would sell a rabid wolf to a puppy petting zoo, look at the dealer who sold us Leonie to us, so you do need to take things with a pinch of salt, and be open to the possibility that things may not be as rosey as they have been painted. Once I’v got to actually viewing the horse in the flesh I have a few rules. I like to see the horse being tacked up, and ridden before I will consider gettingon board myself. Before I bought Florence, a yard that I had had some dealings with, who knew I was blind, and who knew I was looking for a horse, contacted me to tell me about a young cob they were selling. I’ve never seen a horse run backwards down the yard when somebody was trying to put his bridle on before! Definitely not the horse for me. I know almost instantly my bum hits the saddle if I feel safe on a horse. It’s difficult to explain, but with some horses I get a butterflies in teh stomach, sitting on top of an unexploded bomb, slightly nauseous feeling before i’ve even put my leg on; whereas, with others, like Florence, Sapphire, and Magnum, I just feel at home.

So, last week i went to view a likely sounding little cob. When I spoke to his owner I got the impression that selling this horse was not an easy thing for her, and she was very concerned that he would go to a home where he would be loved as much as they love him. He sounded very genuine, and, whilst not your typical dressage horse, he did sound like he’d be more than capable of doing the kind of dressage that I want to do. He had apparently been bought as a confidence giver for her teenage son, after he had had a bad experience with another horse, and he had done such a good job in this role, that her son now found him a little bit too steady. Well, that sounded ideal to me!So, off we went to darkest Cornwall, to meet a lovely Mother and Son and their gorgeous little cob. He handled beautifully, the lad was more than happy to show hin off to me, this cob definately can, and he’s a good little junper too, and then I got on. At this point I think it is fair to point out that. The horses owners were quite tall,wel in comparison to me a lot of people are quite tall, and as the horse is only 14.3hh, they never use a mounting block, in fact thy don’t have one. This could havr been a massiv problem for me, as, not only am I short, but I have restricted movement and strength in my left hip, so mounting even a very small pony from the ground is just plain not going to happen. I needn’t have worried. this genuine little horse stood like a rock while I scrambled up onto a wooden block thing that they used as a junp, and then scrambled up onto his back from there.Yes, this was one of those feeling at home horses. So a short plod around the school trying not to ride into the jumps, then a short hack out, and i was feeling very safe and secure indeed.

On Friday we had him vetted, and the vet couldn’t find even the smallest thing wrong with him.

So…

Let me introduce you to Mr Mayo (just plain Mayo to his friends).

He’s an 8 y.o., 14.3hh, bay roan, bllagdon, cob gelding.

I’ve been trying not to say too much about him until he got here because I think that selling him has not been an easy decision for his previous owners, and if I’m perfectly honest, I half expected them to change their minds before he got here. However, Hal has been just as excited about his pending arrival as I have, and, even though I asked him not to, he just couldn’t help telling people about Mayo.

Mayo wasn’t supposed to be coming to us until Saturday, but here in the South West we’ve got a severe weather warning for storm force winds (gulp) on Saturday. They’ve even cancelled the Board Masters Surf Festival in Newquay, which is where he came from. So they decided to bring him up early. Suits me!

He seems to be taking everything in his stride so far. Yes, he’s only been here a few hours yet, but compared to others I’ve had over the years, he is remarkably calm about having been left on a strange yard, with strange people, and strange horses. So here’s hoping he’s going to carry on that way.

So now we’re back up to 3 horses. The future is looking very bright indeed.

Magic Moments

It’s already really hard to remember that Peregrine has only been with us for 12 days. This small bundle of undiluted cheek and joi de vive has already wormed his way right into our hearts. He’s such a happy, jolly pony. OK, so, he’s still at that baby stage where everything goes into his mouth. I do seem to have had my arm down his throat retrieving things that no pony should eat, on an almost daily basis, and those inquisitive teeth are sharp! He’ll grown up though, and his winning personality makes up for any little, erm, accidents, along th way.

When it comes to his actual job, being a companion for Florence, well, even that’s going better than expected. Yes, he’s a youngster, and so considerably more energetic and playful that his older field mate, but they do seem to have bonded really well already.

This mornign I had one of those magic , just me and the horses moments. Both horses, stood together, waiting by the gate. No argy-bargy, in fact it could easily have been 1 horse with 2 heads. Florence is fully accepting of, and relaxed with Peregrine now. Both of them had time for a chat, and it felt like they both genuinely wanted to spend some time with me. When I was filling the water troughs, Flo wandered off a little to graze, but Perry (yes that’s what feels natural) decided to ‘help’ me witht he water.I ended up quite wet.

A lovely August morning, not too hot, not too cold, so far too early for the flies, birds singing, the countryside waking up around me, 2 gorgeous, friendly, relaxed horses. No better way to start the day. Just magic!.

48 Hours From Hell

Sunday was very hot, so when we caught the girls in, and Breeze was breathing a bit hard, I didn’t think much of it. She was hot and bothered and just suffering with the heat. While Hal did some Brush Cutting down in the bottom field in preparation for Florence and Breeze to move down there for a couple of weeks, Ben and I had a sort out day in the takc room. As we worked Ben commented on how fat Breeze had become, and we joked about her being about to have a foal. Ben of course thought that it was highly likely that a random stallion had junped into the field, and then disappeared, leaving both mares in foal. He claimed both foals as his, but not until they were 4, when he would break them in and turn them both into champion show jumpers. It was a good day.

On Monday Hal and I, with Quincey, ventured to the other side of Barnstaple, to Barnstaple Equestrian Supplies, which is a place we had never been to before, to buy me a new, competition legal, riding hat. What a brilliant place,and what great customer service! I can’t recommend them highly enough. There was no rush, and a wide selection of hats to try, a bowl of water for Q, and a cuppa for Hal and I. I left with a brand new Gatehouse hat, and a feeling that it genuinely mattered to them that I bought the right hat for me. We will definitely be going back. Monday was also a good day…

Until Monday evening that is.

When we went to do our late night checks on the girls we found Breeze in a bit of a bad way. Breathing hard, and reluctant to move, I suspected colic or laminitis. We brought both horses up into the stables, which was a real struggle for poor Breeze, so enter the emmergency out of hours vet. He commented on how fat she was, but couldn’t find any sign of Laminitis or colic, instead he was worried by her breathing, which had turned into a proper heave. Suspecting some kind of allerggic asthmatic reaction to whatever plant was in pollen down the bottom he administered intravenous steroids, anti spasmodics, bronchodilators etc and left me their oral counter parts. Now, having experienced exactly thisscenario with Florence a couple of times over the years, I was confident that I’d find a happy relaxed pony in the morning, so I was a bit concerned when, on checking her at 6ish on Tuesday morning she wasn’t really any better. Still fat, still heaving, and still reluctant to move. I left her with a small breakfast with her meds in and carried on as normal. Even though he hadn’t left us until twenty past twelve that morning, David the vet phoned me before 9 to ask after Breeze. When I reported no change he sounded concerned, but told me not to worry as the meds were cumulative, and that the intravenous meds could take up to a day to work. However, he said to call back if there was no inprovement. He also advised me to leave her in, as he was sure she was readting to something in the field. So, off I went to Melissa’s to have my last lesson before Nationals, which went extraordinarily well. As we drove home I have to admit that I was buzzing with excitement for the forthcoming weekend.Sadly my joi de vive was short lived. When we got home Breeze was not better, and hadn’t touched her breakfast.

I phoned the vets immediately to give them an update, and another vet, Dan, was dispatched. Dan did the same examinations as David had, checked she wasn’t running a temperature, and tried to listen to her heart, but couldn’t hear it for her breathing. Definately not Laminitis, and definately not colic. He agreed that it must be an allergic reaction to something; but suggested we truned her out as he ws worried that the stable environment might be making matters worse.So we turned the girls back out, not into the bottom though, and while Florence was delighted, and shot off to have a role and eat some grass, Breeze , who found walking down to the paddock really difficult, just stood by the gate looking miserable and getting hot.. By 4.30 Breeze still hadn’t moved. Another panicky conversation with David, and the duty vet was dispatched. Imagine my surprise when my old vet from where we used to live, Keiren, arrived. This straight talking old school vet’s first question was”Has nobody said anthing about this oedema?”. There hadn’t been any oedema earlier, but there certainly was now/ Keiren was concerned that this wasn’t really anything to do with Breezes respiratory system, but actually circulatory. She still didn’t have a temperature, but just in case there ws some underlying infection, he decided to give her an antibiotic injection. However, when he stuck the needle in to her vein, blood spirted out like it was an artery! A lot of blood! Hal had to leave the stable! Blood is not supposed to spirt out of veins, veins are not supposed to be under pressure.

AT 6 yesterday morning, at first I actually thought Breeze sounded like she wasn’t breathing as hard. Perhaps it was wishful thinkingon my part because the oedema had got much much worse. Poor girl, she had a shelf on the frontof her chest, and it ran all the way back to her udder. In fact, her teats were hidden in a groove between two huge swellings.

Vet number 4, Gemma, was sent out. She had been sent to take blood samples; but by the time she got to us, Hal and I had come to the conclusion that poor Breeze was going down hill still further. It did n’t take long for Gemma to come to the same conclusion.

Gemma put Breeze to sleep there and then. The poor girl dropped like a stone. She really was very poorly, and I suspect only staying alive out of pure stubbornness.

Afterwards, Gemma looked at Breeze lying there and suggested that she wasn’t naturally fat. Gemma suggested that Breeze most probably had some kind of tumour , probably in her liver, which had got so big that it was putting pressure on her lungs and compromising her circulatory system. Poor little pony.

Losing Breeze presented me with a new problem.

Florence

Florence has terrible seperation anxiety. She hates being by herself. While we were waiting for the man to come and collect Breeze, Florence had a really bad panic attack, charging around the stable, kicking and bellowing. She would only stand still if either Hal or I stood with her. If we tried to move away from her stable door she would start racketing around the stable again. Once Breeze had been collected, we decided to try turning Florence out. At least she could move around more freely, and would be less likely to injure herself in the stable. So she spent the next couple of hours charging around the paddock bellowing.

Mow what was I supposed to do? I can’t leave Florence in this state or she’ll make herself ill, or do herself a mischeif. Not only that, but the whole village must be able to hear her.I’m supposed to be going away on Friday. How can i do that? Amy is brilliant, but she can’t be here 24 -7. Perhaps I shouldn’t go to Nationals. I can’t let everyone down though, a lot of people have put themselves out to get me to this point. Oh God what can I do?

Enter Melissa, who kindly offered to come and get Florence and take her to Kingsland until we get back from Nationals and find her a companion.. What a star! My next concern was that Florence doesn’t travel very well. Well, actually, I’ve only ever travelled her once, when we brought her home. And she really didn’t travel very well then.

I needn’t have worried. Florence loaded into Melissa’s lorry like a pro, and apparently travelled like a dream. Who knew!? Florence has settled into Melissa’s really well, has been turned out with one of her Riding School ponies and they are getting along like a house on fire. She has also come into season, and there is a lot of flirting going on, it turns out that Alfie rather fancies her.

Today I hav applied to rehome a pony from the Mare and Foal Sanctuary as a companion. They seem confident that they will be able to help me.

So here I am then. Mourning the sudden and unexpected death of Breeze, who until this week, was the least of my worries. Not knowing quite what to do with myself because, for the first time for 5 years there are no horses here at Albert’s Bungalow. tomorrow Hal, Quincey and I are off to Hartbury and on Saturday i will compete in the biggest competition I have ever taken part in. I should be excited, but I’m actually just very tired and upset.

Feeling Down

What is wrong with me!? I should be feeling like a kiddy on Christmas Eve. I’m in a really unusual, and, what should be very exciting situation. Not only have I qualified for the RDA National Championships (Who’d have thought?); but I am officially looking for a new horse, one that I will continue to do RDA Dressage with, and that I will be able to do some of the brilliant things that the Riding Club do with, and, unusually for me, I’ve got what feels like a massive budget for said horse. Usually I’m buying in the cheaper range, and I’ve been stretching my resources to do that. Not this time. You’d think I’d be like a dog with two tails, bursting with excitement, like a kiddy who’s been told they can have anything they want from the toyshop regardless of it’s price. What iactually feel is – well – nothing much to be honest, and I don’t really understand why. Don’t get me wrong, It’s not that I don’t want another horse, I really do, and I am thoroughly enjoying my newfound RDA Dressage success. I should be buzzing with enthusiasm, but frankly what I feel is flat and a bit down. Somebody take me out and slap me please! I’ve been trying to work out why I’m feeling this way, and I can only imagine it’s for one of the following reasons.

1. It’s not the prospect of having another horse that’s actually the problem here, it’s the act of finding one. I do find the process of buying horses extremely daunting. I miss the days when you buy your local Newspaper on a Thursday or Friday, turn to the, extensive, Horses for Sale section at the back, and read through all the adverts, circling all the likely candidates, then phoning the seller and havinga proper chat with them before deciding to go and have a look at said beast. OK, so, nowadays I wouldn’t be able to actually read the ads myself; but now things have gone on-line even finding horse ads is challenging. Yes, there are plenty of websites where you can buy and sell horses, but they are none of them particularly accessible. Face Book used to be a useful place to look for horses, but they have just banned selling animals. It’s all a bit problematic really. However, that’s just the beginning of the problem, once I find a suitable sounding horse , I’ve then got to go and see it. The act of going to a strange yard, with strange people, who have their own preconceptions about blindess, or who, despite my careful explaination of my situation, may not have fully comprehended that I am blind, and then having to get on a strange horse, that may or may not have been honestly described, and so may or may not be as safe as it’s been cracked up to be, makes me feel very uncomfortable, and extremely vulnerable. I’ve had some, erm, interesting experiences over the years to say the least.

2. Over the last 3 and a bit years we’ve lost 3 horses. OK, Magnum was very old, Sapphire had cancer, and Leonie, well, things weren’t good with her, but nevertheless, 3 horses gone in 3 years is a lot in my book. Now we have Florence and Breeze, who, granted are both in their twenties, but Breeze has had to retire from being ridden, and, despite my earlier post about Florence being on the mend, sadly she seems to be going backwards again at the moment. Florence hasn’t been right all year, and I may yet have to retire her as well. So that’s 3 dead horses, 1 going blind, and 1 with some kind of chronic/intermittent lameness/pain issue. Really, am I the best person to take on another horse? I just seem to break them all the time! Is a new horse going to be safe in my hands? I love horses, all horses, but Florence in particular is the absolute centre of my universe. For the last 6 months she’s been trying to tell me what’s wrong, and I just can’t seem to be able to understand what’s she’s trying to tell me. I’ve spent a fortune on vet’s, tess, and treatments, but things are still not entirely right with her. If I bring another horse onto this yard is it just going to end up trying to tell me something that I just can’t hear? Am I really capable of looking after them properly? I’m really doubting my abilities at the moment, and that’s putting me off going out there and putting any real effort into finding another horse.

As it happens, there is a real lack of horses out there anyway, or at least, if they are there, I’m not seeing the adverts.I keep reading that we are in the midst of a horse crisis, too many horses, not enough people who want, or can afford to take them on, so where are they all then? So far, I’ve only really seen one horse that I would have wanted to go and view, and that sold within a week of me first seeing the ad. Now, I know that I have quite specific requirements, but really, all I need is a safe,responsive, weight carrier. What I actually want is a younger Florence, perhaps one who is more comfortable travelling, and who is a little bit less bitey ,but neverthe less, Florence, her personality,attitude, and build, is just right for me. They must be out there somewhere, but all I’m seeing advertised is ex racehorses (I’d snap a Thoroughbred), imacculately bred, high powered warm bloods and Sports Horses, ponies, or horses that sound ideal, but nap, have an injury, aren’t safe on the roads, or have never been in a school. I keep seeing the same horses on every site, or I think I’ve found a good one, but it’s in Ireland, or is being listed by a Dealer, who is regularly mentioned on the Dodgey Dealers listsNot only that, but this purchase is dependant on the sale of Hal’s late parents hous. Well, that’s going well, not. Today is the day we were supposed to be completing. Yeh right. We’ve just been told that the buyers, who were supposed to be cash buyers, hence why Hal accepted such a low offer. haven’t quite got there mortgage sorted yet! So now they are screwing us around and apparently can’t complete until 1st July. That is of course if they are actually going to complete and aren’t some kind of fantasists. Let’s face it, it’s a long way from cash buyers to can’t get the mortgage sorted. So there probably isn’t going to be a new horse anyway. So wht am I worried about.